New Year...New Head...New Age

We just made the appointment to get Rachel's staples removed, which by the way, are too many to count. On Wednesday, January 4th she will get them removed at Henry Ford Medical Center. I assume she will want me to "buzz" her head one more time before she starts to grow her hair back out. Next week is a busy one as Rachel has the staples removed, Abbey has her 12 month check up and Rachel has a driving therapy appointment. Thank God for family living close by as I cannot handle all this with my work schedule.

Abbey's birthday is Sunday, Jan 1st (yes, she was born on New Year's day for those of you who did not know.) She will be 1!!! Rachel has planned a "princess party." We should have about 18 people, cake, balloons, presents and all. I know all you experienced parents will laugh at this BUT...she is growing up SO fast! Her mother and I need to check with the doctor because I sure would like to have more!!!

I will do my best to post pictures from Abbey's first birthday in a few days.

**Above picture is Abbey on X-mas morning in her Mrs. Clause outfit with her favorite present, a doll, of course.

Getting Better On Christmas Eve

After a few "bumps," Rachel seems to be getting better. She gave us a few scares since we've been home from the hospital. We had to call the nurse the first day because her bladder was not working. The nurse said we had until 3:00 in the afternoon or we needed to go to the ER. Right around 3:00 the bladder "kicked in." She then started complaining about funny "noises" in her head. She desribed the noises as clanging and grinding sounds. I asked her to call our neuro-surgeon's assistant. The nurse said that this was not a good sign and she explained there was a build up of fluid. Obviously, this was discouraging, as Rachel and I did not have the energy (mentally or physically) to go back to the hospital and deal with more issues. The nurse pleaded with Rachel to take it easy and call her back the next morning. So far so good, as Rachel claims that the "noises" are fading. We are looking forward to the next few days. We plan on spending the day together wrapping gifts and we might get together with family for dinner and then participate in a Christmas Eve worship service at our church. We are excited to experience Abbey's first Christmas and we daily count our blessings.

No Need For A Christmas List This Year

Rachel is home! This morning the doctor said she would be in the hospital until Wednesday. However, later in the afternoon they decided to relaese her. She is VERY sore as she has been on morphine and other strong pain meds. The doctor said this surgery is actually much more painful than the first surgery. She has a lot of swelling and over 100 staples in her head. That being said, she is currently sound asleep! Praise God! She will have some lifting restrictions for several days...so no picking up Abbey. I spent last night with her in the hospital. Watching your spouse in pain is the worst feeling in the world. She is tough and I am so proud to be her husband. I'd marry her 1000 times over.

I must admit I love receiving gifts; however, this Christmas ALL I want is to enjoy the day with Rachel and Abbey. I am so blessed. I have two wonderful parents, a brother and sister that love me, great in-laws, a beautiful (and healthy) wife and daughter and a handful of incredible friends. Who needs a Christmas list with blessings such as these?

Closure?

Well, surgery is over and Rachel seems ok! She is sore and groggy but is expected to make a nice recovery. Her surgery lasted about an hour longer due to some unexpected swelling (which I'm still trying to get all the info. from the doctor). She was pretty emotional when I saw her in the recovery room. I'm not sure if it was pain, medicine, emotions from all she has been through, or ALL three! However, she seems to be doing fine. We will spend the night in ICU and hopefully get to go home tomorrow, at the latest, Wednesday. We finally have a little closure (a little joke for those of you with a sense of humor) and we are looking forward to a peaceful holiday season. We will still have to get staples out, a final MRI and address the "heart issue." But for now, all is well. Again, your prayers have meant so much as Rachel and I are indebted to you all. I'll post more info as I receive it.

Klint

**Please continue to pray for my friends Brian and Aly Thrift as Aly is in surgery as I write this blog.

Rachel's Surgery

We found out yesterday that Rachel needs to be at Henry Ford Medical Center at 6:00 am on Monday morning, December 19th. Just 48 hours from now! I'm assuming the surgery will begin an hour or so after we arrive and should last an hour and a half to two hours. Please keep her and our family in your prayers. Your thoughts and prayers have gotten us through and I'm confident we will feel "covered" on Monday morning as well. Thank you! I'll do my best to blog sometime Monday.

Thanks.

Klint

"God Will Be Who He Will Be"

Below is a comment that my friend and colleague, Scott Samuels posted a few days ago on this blog.

As long as I am "robed in flesh" I will struggle with the intersection of the rational and the mystical. I am challenged by Klint's thoughts and our discussions often revolve around this topic.
I share most of Klint's thoughts regarding prayer. I especially wish that we would pray for God's transforming work in our lives as much as we pray for Sister So-and-So to recover from her gallbladder surgery.
The older I get, the more I am humbled by the mystery of God and the necessity to simply surrender to Him in faith. My ability to understand is diminishing, not increasing, with age and maturity.
I certainly don't believe that God listens to our prayers, legal pad in hand, and then acts when enough righteous requests have been received. At the same time, I don't pretend to know how He does discern and act.
I know one thing that has helped my faith to mature. As I sat on the cold, hard, tile floor of Henry Ford Hospital with my friend Klint, I poured my heart out to God for his intervention in the life and death struggle that he and Rachel were engaged in. I had no where else to turn, no where else to go. I prayed in faith, knowing that He was able, not knowing what He would do.
I pray for one thing these days, that God will transform me and that the reality of His Spirit in me will accomplish something for His Kingdom.

I want to reiterate that God can do whatever He wants and is capable of everything and anything. My post the other day was meant to simply challenge us to examine our prayer lives and consider how we communicate with God. I have no answers and I certainly do not have the inside track on how to properly communicate with God. However, my best professors in College and the ones I learned the most from had the ability to think outside the box and get me to look at things in ways I never had before. I learned to doubt and question and more importantly, I learned that it is ok and even healthy to do that. I think Scott's comments are right on and provide an authentic case study on genuine prayer. Let's keep looking, doubting, questioning and walking the path of faith together. As my friend and mentor, Randy Harris says, "In the fullness of time, God will be who He will be."

Thanks for taking part in this discussion.

Abbey, Santa and God

"As for me and my house, we will trust in Santa"

I know I sort of changed this verse a little, but I'm ok with that. Abbey visited Santa for the first time the other day and would you believe she did not cry! I must admit she didn't laugh, giggle and smile either.

Rachel and I had "the conversation" last night. You know, the conversation most church of Christ parents probably had at some point, "what are we going to tell our child about Santa, will we tell Abbey that Santa's real?" The conversation was VERY short. Our decision...Santa IS REAL! My mother and I LOVE Christmas. The rest of the family likes it too, but I don't know if they like it like mom and I do. My dad would be fine with a cup of coffee, a copy of the Detroit Free Press and some nuts. He could probably do with or without the tree, lights, parades and all the other stuff that makes it X-mas. My mom convinced my dad to take her to see "The Polar Express" last Chritmas season. Mom loved it, and again, dad would have rather had the coffee and paper. Why did mom enjoy it??? I think it's because she still believes. Believes in Santa and the magic of X-mas. You might think all this is silly, but I have a point.

I'm going to teach Abbey about God one day. I'm going to ask her to trust in Him and put all her faith in Him. What am I going to say when she asks, "Where is He? Can I meet Him? Can I see Him?" I'm going to ask her to believe with all her heart that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. And I will explain that He was born of a virgin. Will she buy it??? I'm going to do my best to convince her that Jesus Christ took upon Him the sin of the world, died for every human being that ever lived and then was raised from the dead, ascended back to heaven and is seated at the right hand of God, His Father (who by the way she still cannot see). I'm going to plead with her that Jesus Christ sent the Holy Spirit to be our counselor and comforter. She will be taught how to pray and be told that God, Jesus and the Spirit listen to us as we try to communicate our feelings. I'm going to try and pull ALL this off KNOWING that I will never be able to introduce her to God.

Yes, you bet I will tell her that Santa is real and she can believe in him as long as she wants to. And maybe she will turn out like my mother and at 55 years of age still believe.

I love you Abbey, Santa will be here soon.

Dad

Brian and Aly Thrift

My good friend Brian Thrift just a strarted a blog you should check out. brianthrift.blogspot.com. Brian and I have known each other a long time but recently became close as we coached together in TX. Brian's wife is 5 months pregnant and has been diagnosed with breast cancer. She will have surgery next week and begin chemo. I have no idea what they are going through and how they must feel. But I do know that their faith's are strong and they are totally devoted to each other. Brian's faith has always been one of great authenticity and depth. A person of few words, but when he speaks it's sort of like E.F. Hutton. That being said, you will be encouraged and challenged by what he shares. I encourage you to check out his blog and send him a comment. It's never easy to be a college basketball coach, I know it can't be easy being a college basketball coach facing this. Hang in there Brian!

Klint

Great Blog!

Please see Randy Dill's blog at randy.blogs.com/randys_weblog/

He has a great posting about prayer, very well thought out and insightful.

Thanks for the kind remarks Randy!!!

A Few Carry-On's

I became so involved as I was posting my comments last night that I did not remember a few "carry-on's." By "carry-on," I mean items that I could not fit into the comments at that time. Here they are. There are two situations FOR ME PERSONALLY when everything I wrote yesterday gets thrown out the window.

1) When I cry out in utter desperation

There was one time during Rachel's ordeal that I literally cried out to the Lord. When Rachel was being transported by ambulance to Henry Ford in the middle of the night a very scary thing happened. We were cruising along and Rachel seemed stable for the time being. All of a sudden a nurse poked her head up front and said, "step on it, were losing her and we may not make it to the hospital." I can still recall the nurse's voice and tone, it was a sickening moment. While we were hitting speeds of over 100 mph I remember literally crying out to God, "just get us to the hospital alive." Total despair, The thought consumed me in such a way that it simply poured out of me.

2) Intercessory prayer

I would NEVER turn down an opportunity to pray with someone. In fact, I'm in a prayer group on Tuesday mornings and I have been praying for a friend all week because he specifically asked me to. At that point it is doesn't really matter to me what the request is. Christianity is ALWAYS relational and I will always pray for anybody who asks. Furthermore, I believe at that moment I am simply interceding for them, so in a way it's that person's faith, but they may not have the energy to pray at that moment.


One more carry-on.

I should have clarified just what I meant by "laundry list and top 10 list" prayer. I was trying to make a point that prayer is so much more than taking a list to God and treating God as if he's a genie in a bottle and if you rub him the right way you just might get 3 wishes. I wonder if that prayer tends to be a little selfish. I was asking us to consider actually spending time with God, no agenda, no lists, just being in his presence and being transformed. Consider prayer not so much as a transaction, I give you something, I get something, but a relationship that focuses on transformation and allowing God's spirit to dwell in us.

These are simply thoughts, not threats. The day I stop questioning and searching is the day I cease to be a true Christian.

I'm Putting God Back In The Box

I'll admit I'm cynical to the point where it's a sin when it comes to this issue. But I'm tired of the phrase, "don't put God in a box" (and all similar phrases). It's a phrase I used to enjoy throwing around, especially to my Dad when I was home from College in the mid 90's. It's funny how much ones God view, world view and theology can evolve and change as you grow spiritually. I'm usually very guarded with whom I choose to share ideas and thoughts on prayer and how God might be working in the world today. That being said I'm getting ready to share some of these very thoughts with whoever chooses to read this posting. Typical responses I tend to get when I share personal ideas about prayer and God's activity in the world are, "you limit God," "your putting God in a box," "God wants us to ask him for everything and anything," "God can't give you what you don't ask for."

I have a problem with the "laundry list" or "top 10 ten" list kind of prayer. Not that it is wrong I just think it may not be the kind of prayer God really desires from me. I struggle with how exactly God intervenes in the world, particularly with regard to physical healing. In fact, this may come as a shock to you but I never prayed once for God to physically heal Rachel and NOBODY loves her or wanted her well more than I did. I just don't believe that sort of prayer is where I should spend my time. People get sick and die of all sorts of diseases all the time. I'll do my best to organize these thoughts as best I can.

I cannot just accept easy answers or explanations to complex issues. I do not believe God manipulates free will. If He did than He would cease to be a relational God and that is the one thing God will never do. He will not break covenant, meaning He will always remain relational in nature. Since I believe He does not manipulate or override ones free will there will always be drunk driving accidents, murder, terrorism, etc... regardless of prayer. That is precisely the reason I cannot get myself to pray for "safe travel," because I believe in doing that, I'm asking God to disregard another's free will. For example, an individual has the ability to make the decision to consume too much alcohol and get behind the wheel. When this happens there is a good chance (because of free will) that people will be harmed and/or killed.

I find it interesting that the only time Jesus cries (that we know of) is when He is asked to bring someone (Lazarus) back to life. I personally believe this caused Jesus much grief because He knew and realized just what He was calling Lazarus back from. By the way, Lazarus still eventually died! So in praying for physical healing aren't we just asking God to delay the natural course of action that was instituted after sin entered into the world? I also want to point out here that Jesus did not come to hand out a miracle every time someone had a need. Did Jesus heal, yes. Jesus was moved with compassion when he saw people hurting. However, we must realize most people Jesus didn't heal. Most people read John’s narrative about the sick man at the pool in Bethzatha and say, "PRAISE THE LORD, JESUS HEALS!!!!" I read Johns words and say, MOST people he didn't heal." Jesus walks by the pool with dozens if not hundreds of sick people and heals one. So most He doesn't heal. What’s the point...It's a big one. Jesus didn't come to heal. The gospel is NOT about how comfortable your life is. It's about putting your faith and trust in a man named Jesus, who never had a home, who didn't have many possessions and who suffered his entire life.

Another aspect I struggle with is when people are inconsistent. For example, week in and week out in bible class and church we pray for people. Relatives, friends, family, loved ones, etc... We pray for cancer to be removed, pregnancies to go well and pain to be relieved. However, just about every church I have been a part of has had a member or members that are blind, paralyzed, mentally handicap, etc... And those people are never prayed over that God may miraculously heal them in our presence. In fact, there is a deaf man that recently placed membership at the church I worship at. He has been attending for several months if not a year. I have NEVER seen his name on a prayer list and to my knowledge he is never prayed over so that his hearing may be restored. Yet, every week we pray (and believe) that God will heal all other types of illnesses. I see this as a strange contradiction. IF Jesus was in the business of healing peoples physical ailments and we really believed that...why isn't the deaf man being prayed for???

So by this point you may be thinking what in the world do I pray for. Prayer is a HUGE part of my spiritual walk; in fact, I like to think I have a very healthy prayer life and communication with God. However, I prefer to spend time in silence before God, I chose to meditate on his word rather than pray a "laundry" or "top 10 list." I find it much more meaningful (and relevant) to spend time in solitude and ask that God would form and shape me more into the image of his Son than to ask for my "cold" to go away or my bank account to miraculously grow.

I've decided to put God back in the box for awhile. And in the box, I hope to find some quiet time to read and be transformed by God's prayer book, the Psalms. In the box, where it is quiet, I will strain to hear the voice of God and to do my best to be discerning. In the box, where all the noise is filtered out, I will pray and listen and hopefully be transformed into the person God intended me to be. In the box, I will find peace as I practice the spiritual disciple of solitude that has sustained so many for so long. In the box, I will realize that God is not my "genie in a bottle" but be reminded that He made himself flesh and dwelt among us and experienced pain, illness, hurt, and most of all abandonment. Jesus wanted a prayer answered so badly that he cursed God when it wasn't answered, "my God, my God, why have you forsaken me??? And God said nothing. Thank God for his silence, for if He would have answered that prayer...there would be no Christians at all.

The house is quiet, my wife and daughter are asleep...I think I'll head to my box.